“he also had major daddy issues and kept talking about the polish theater his father owned.”
Anonymous reader “Nicole” writes in:
during fall i tend to go crazy so i had been isolating myself. my best
friend called me and wanted to go out. i agreed and we ended up at
this loft party where there were people dancing on stage and a dj and
hundreds of hipsters. nothing new, but i hadn’t been around it for a
while. every time i get in large crowds i want to do terrible things,
so i started pounding the PBR’s we had brought in our bags. a guy
walked up to me and i was immediately creeped out. he introduced
himself as a friend of a friend and said that we could drink his gin,
it was a gift to us. i told him i don’t drink gin. bff and i couldn’t
figure out of it was skeezy or gay, so we lost him by dancing in the
crowd. after dancing i was drunk and found him as they were closing
the loft down.
talking to him the second time i realized a couple things: 1. i had
met him before because he used to sleep on the couch at my
ex-boyfriend’s apartment. 2. he dated this insane woman who was a 35
year old go-go dancer and used to get me stoned and try to teach me
life lessons. we got into a dispute over roller skates this woman’s
roommates gave me. she wanted them back. i refused and we stopped
talking. 3. he and i had both had sex in my ex-boyfriend’s bedroom
with our respective exes at different times and i had thought he was
kind of attractive.
by the time i made this connection his strange face, huge nose, and
weird pants no longer mattered. he was tall and polish and into me. my
friend hailed a cab to the gay bar and she wanted to go in but i
decided to wait for polish guy to come meet me. i was in a nearby
alley alone, getting rained on and pounding beers by myself when he
called me. we started making out and caught a bus to my place.
i took him home within two hours of leaving my apartment. once inside
i kept saying how i wanted to drink until i blacked out, but he
wouldn’t let me. i had no reservations in saying things so we had this
conversation:
“Why are you kissing me?”
“What?”
“Do you think I’m cute?”
“Yes.”
“Ok. Well you hadn’t told me yet.”
he also had major daddy issues and kept talking about the polish
theater his father owned. he said he was kind of homeless. he was
living in an RV behind his father’s theater and then moving to Toronto
in two days. i didn’t care about any of this and then we had sex and
it was really good (i was just getting out of a break up and hadn’t
had an active sex life in almost a year.) he was really big and he
knew what he was doing. i just didn’t really look at his face.
throughout the night he didn’t touch me except when he wanted to have
sex and we ended up having sex five times.
the next day we went to a very awkward lunch and i found out he was
really into conspiracy theories and anarachy. he told me that the
water supply will someday run out and how much better canada will be.
he also told me about a bike shop i should go to so that i could do
winter biking. he dropped me off at work and kissed me and said he
would call to see if i went to the bike shop. two weeks later he
actually called me from new york city and said he was on the way to
canada and wanted to know if i had been to the bike shop, but i didn’t
pick up.
i doubt we will ever talk again, but i like to think i was the last
american girl he ever had.